Monday 4 September 2017

On Taking Back Your Power and Owning Your Shit

I read an Instagram post today, by Rose McGowan. Do you know her? She was the new sister in Charmed once Shannen Doherty left. Are y'all old enough to have seen Charmed?
Anyways.
Here's the post.

I remember wanting to cry that day. Well everyday really. Every day I filmed this movie. I was pressured into doing it for all the wrong reasons ( big @UTA agentess known for her cruelty and I believe hatred of beautiful young women.) This woman who was meant to develop and further my career pushed me to do my first studio film. It was called Ready to Rumble and it was expected to be a hit. I threw the script in the trash 3 times. But I hadn't worked since the sexual assault. I didn't want to do this movie. It was stupid as hell. I was told by my agent that if I did this big studio film @warnerbros would put me in the next Clint Eastwood film. It wasn't a bad set, I just didn't want to there. Every day I was pushed to be an over the top sex object and nothing else. Written by basics, captured and filmed by a man, produced by men, edited by a man, music by men, sold to theaters by men and on your screens courtesy of men. And I was sold into it by a woman. On set I mostly tried to project out of my body and into a safe place on the astral plane. Look at what my eyes say in this picture. You may see a hot young chick, I see reinforcement of stereotypes, horrible career management, and personal vacancy. While my body was left on earth and got stuck being embarrassed, not valued and to serve as only the sexy object in a film. Sent to tittilate young boys and make girls aspire to be me cos I turned their boy on. See how that works? In my book BRAVE, I am pulling back the iron curtain. This is not a tell. This is a tell it how it is. - Rose McGowan 'excerpt from BRAVE the book' coming in February @harperonebooks LINK for pre-order in bio ☝️☝️ #brave #rosearmy #anarmyofthought

A post shared by Rose McGowan (@rosemcgowan) on

And I was thinking earlier how people have the absolute wrong reactions to things, and what the appropriate reaction is to a certain thing. For example, President Trump telling victims of #HurricaneHarvey to 'have a good time'...clearly something is missing somewhere. Is it sociopathy do you think? Or just lack of empathy? His mama didn't bring him up right? He just could not absolutely care less?
We seem to lack a lot in the empathy department these days.
So here I was, reading this post, and I figured that the expected appropriate reaction would be...what? pity? sympathy? outrage at Hollywood? At the 'woman' who 'sold Rose out?'
I don't know.
I'm serious.
Tell me what the appropriate reaction is.
Because I suspect that my reaction was a bit to the left of the field.
When I read it, this proverb was going through my head;


Rose points the finger at her agent, at Hollywood studios...says she wanted to throw the script in the bin but...Clint Eastwood movie! So okay according to her she had to sell her soul to Crowley in order to get what she wanted. 


According to my understanding of how demon deals work, you have to agree to it yes? You seal the deal with a kiss and you hand over your soul. So then what? Do you blame the devil for taking it? The devil's just doing his job. Willing buyer, willing seller.
To agree to do a trashy piece of work and then to turn around and say, "The woman agent sold me out" and "Hollywood made promises they (didn't?) deliver." is to sell your soul and then complain about the devil buying it.


This. is. your. shit.
Own it.
Rose wanted something. She felt like this was one way to get it. It didn't work out for her. Or it did. I don't know. I just know that shaming that agent for being cut throat and ruthless and doing her job because she is a woman is everything feminism should be against right? Why expect this woman agent to coddle you? Or baby sit or whatever the fuck she expected? The agent is working hard for her money, earning her commissions. If you're uncomfortable with the job, it isn't slavery, you can say no.
You can quit. You can find another way.
But you didn't.
That was your choice, Rose.
Yours.
Not your woman agent's.
Not Hollywood's.
I get that this is a very unsympathetic way to look at it but life is hard man. Reality is harsh. Gotta learn to deal with that shit.

Speaking of owning things and taking my power back, She Leads Africa did a feature on me in August about how I took my power back from publishers who weren't even willing to use lubricant. You can read it here.

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